Seconds

Last night myself and the siblings were coming back from Taraweeh (night) prayers at the mosque, mum was driving us home. It was the usual deal me and my two sisters in the back and my brother with my mum at the front. I had the window down and was looking out, being in quite a reflective mood. I told the others that I felt a bit lost in thought. They responded with talking about the fresh cake that was awaiting us in the fridge. Typical.

The road ahead was clear mum was driving down the main road and to our right a black taxi cab was turning right into another road. It all happened so quickly but it’s still so vivid. Out of nowhere a car came at high speed and was inches away from crashing into us. Alhamdulillah mum swerved out of the way and instead the car crashed into the side of the black cab. It turned out the cab driver was Muslim too and was returning from the mosque just as we had. We were all so lucky. The cabbies car was wrecked but thankfully it seemed that it hadn’t impacted the driver’s side as much, otherwise it may have been a very different story. The other driver came out and looked unsteady on his feet we all presumed he was drunk. His bumper was off, his tyres deflated and headlights smashed.

Mum was furious. My youngest sister was in shock. The cabbie came over and asked mum to stay as a witness and mum agreed. She then went over to the cars and had a go at the guy for being careless and nearly driving into us and hurting her children. At this point people had started to come out of their houses after hearing the noise. What we found weird was that clearly there had been a very loud crash noise but it’s almost as if in those few seconds of it happening we were in a vacuum, none of us recollect hearing the noise even though all our windows were down.

People talk of cheating death. But it’s not true no one can ‘cheat’ death. Allah swt has planned for us every minute of our lives. Alhamdulillah last night was not our time to depart. Nan rang this morning she had heard what happened and scolded me for not telling her about it. Bless her we didn’t want her to worry. Nan amongst other other family members and friends have said that the Angels were watching over us and protecting us that night. Every time someone speaks to me or tells me how lucky we were, it gives me this weird unexplainable feeling. Nan reminded me that my whole family was in the car apart from my dad. She kept saying imagine if something had happened to all of you.

After the initial shock my thoughts turned to what if that had been my last couple of moments, how was I leaving this earth? What had I done during my time here? Weirdly earlier in the day I had had this feeling of contacting all my uni friends to see how they were doing as I hadn’t spoken to them since exams. It had been a couple of weeks since I had spoken to my two best friends, I had planned to text them once I got back from the mosque. I had even had a call from Dorothy in the morning, a couple of months back she told me she had been ill and it seems she still was and the Drs weren’t sure what was wrong. I promised her I would come and visit her after Ramadan.

They say you should live every minute as if it’s your last and to remember death often because it could take us at any moment in time. Me and my Sister have often discussed this in the past, it’s not like we’re in denial we’re going to die but I don’t know. Although we think of death we can’t grasp the enormity of it all and its implications. But it hit me last night. This has definitely been a wakeup call and the month of Ramadan has been like a detox to de-clutter and cleanse physically and emotionally. So I’m going to use this opportunity to move on forward and to remember to count my blessings every day.

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